and there is malignant code attached to a total of zero of these files.
I had a bit of a scare about it tonight, cause I got a mail in my inbox with the following headers:

From: postmaster [postmaster@jaymis.com]
To: jaymis@jaymis.com
Subject: Undeliverable mail--"END OF WEBTRENDS LIVE TAG"
The following mail can't be sent to RyanIsStupid00@aol.com:

From: jaymis@jaymis.com
To: RyanIsStupid00@aol.com
Subject: END OF WEBTRENDS LIVE TAG
The file is the original mail

Now, being that I'm getting a load of Klez action in my mailbox at the moment, and that there's always a possibility of something getting through my virus-scanner (even though I keep it updated like a good boy), when I saw this I had a couple of thoughts:

• "END OF WEBTRENDS LIVE TAG" looks like something that could have come from my computer - I used to use webtrends live, so there could be some fragment of them in my cache (Klez makes up email subjects by searching cache)


• If there's an email bounced, how many got through


• If there's been a virus outbreak on my computer I'll never be able to show my self-righteous viral-zealout face ever again


• My hand smells kinda like poop

So I closed outlook and ran a full virusscan. 45 minutes and 141,327 files later everything's clear (naturally) and I went back into outlook to have a closer look at the email:

Return-Path: < valiant@operationsmeh.com >
Delivered-To: jaymis.com-jaymis@jaymis.com
Received: (qmail 73709 invoked from network); 24 May 2002 09:51:21 -0000
Received: from unknown (HELO mta02.mail.mel.aone.net.au) (203.2.192.82)
by mail.prohosters.com with SMTP; 24 May 2002 09:51:21 -0000
Received: from Hwqkv ([63.34.199.207]) by mta02.mail.mel.aone.net.au
with SMTP

Let's have a little look at that one again, but in slow motion:

R e t u r n - P a t h : < v a l i a n t @ o p e r a t i o n s m e h . c o m >
D e l i v e r e d - T o : j a y m i s . c o m - j a y m i s @ j a y m i s . c o m
R e c e i v e d : ( q m a i l 7 3 7 0 9 i n v o k e d f r o mSTOP
Wind it back a little.

Return-Path: < valiant@operationsmeh.com >

Aah. Mr Valiant. We remember you, don't we. You were the clever gent who spammed every e/n site in Australia looking for some linkwh0ring, then a week later managed to get badtrans and send it to everyone you'd been annoying.
Fucktard.
Oh well, it's been four months and two days since his last email. Let's hope he can go the full half-year this time without bothering me.

/Werds
I've been taking into crates ever since I was living in space
Before the rat race, before monkeys had human traits
Mastered numerology and big bang theology
Preformed lobotomies with telekinetic psychology
Invented the mic so I could start blessing it
And chin checkin' kids to make my point like an impressionist
Many men have tried to shake us
But I twist mic cords to double helixes and show them what I’m made of
I buckle knees like leg braces
Cast the spell of instrumental-ness and all of you emcees that hate us
So try on, leave you without a shoulder to cry on
From now to infinity let icons be bygones
I fire bomb ghostly notes haunt this
I’ve tried threats but moved on to a promise
I stomp shit with or without an accomplice
and run the gauntlet with whoever wants this

High voltage
The unforgettable sound
High voltage
Bringing you up and taking you down
High voltage
Coming at you from every side
High voltage
Making the rhythm and rhyme collide