Oh baby, do it to me. Yeah, I'll be naughty for you. Yeah. YEAH. Oh treat me rough. I'll do anything you want me to do. YEAH STICK IT IN ME!

...

No that's not some dodgy porn-thing, it's James eating the pizza-thing he just made. This is one fabulous pizza, it made me go all tingly. I'll tell you how to make it, so you too can be tingly:

Stuff:
- Caramelised onions (if you don't know how to make caramelised onions, I pity your poor-dark soul. Look it up on the web or something. Put some Anchovies into them, that's especially good)
- Mushrooms - 3 or 4 big ones, or more-than-that little ones
- Spices that you like. To cook the muchrooms and onions in. I use "McCormick Gourmet Grill and BBQ Bush Spices", which have a really great earthy balance/taste. If you live in Australia, grab some, you won't regret it. If you live somewhere else, still try. If you can't find them, then use your own mix. Something which will compliment the bassy flavours in the mushroom and blend with the onions. Use crushed coriander seed, pepper, rosemary, lemongrass, fennel seed... Whatever you like.
- Small turkish-type bread. Or foccacia. Possibly paninni. Definitely not wonder white.
- Blue-vein or gorgonzola cheese, or another cheese that you like. Preferably smelly. Not too much. Crumbled up ready to sprinkle onto pizza.
- Tomato puree. Not that crap concentrate stuff. Real tomato. Make it yourself and don't be lazy.
- Topping cheeses. Plenty of cheddar for bulk. Bit of mozzarella for stretch. Bit of Parmesan for flavour.Grated.

How to do it:

Heat oven to 200 degrees.
Cut the bread in half down the middle and lay the halves side-by-side in a baking dish. Spoon some tomato onto the bread and cover with a thin layer of cheese.
Put sliced mushrooms and caramelised onions into a pan with some olive oil and spices. Turn up the heat and cook the crap out of them. Don't be nice to mushrooms, treat them like your bitch. They'll taste better.
When the mushrooms are pretty much cooked (they've shrunk a lot and darkened, and they're nice and hot) turn the heat off and tip the contents of the pan onto the bread. It should be a nice big mound. This is the sign of a good pizza :)
Crumble the smelly cheese onto the mound.
Rest of the cheese goes on top. Make sure you miss the base with some of it so it goes onto the baking dish. This will go all nice and crispy and taste like yummy crunchy cheese.
Stick it in the oven until it's cooked. (If you dont know if it's cooked, ask your Mum)
Stick it on a plate and eat it before it goes cold.
Make sure you make appreciative "happy-eating-noises" as you consume your fantastic dinner. Especially if there's someone else who looks interested/disgusted in it.

All good.

Check out this site now that your stomach is full. It's a bit weird. It's the first one I've gone to on the front page of the May 1st Reboot, which is full of great design, and some crap that's not worth the electrons it's distributed on.

Before I go... Ninjai. This is cool. Check out the preview. Kid's voice is annoying, but it's like a grungy DragonballZ done in flash. Me wikee!