Or perhaps that's a little dramatic, but it was extremely warm in my room, warm enough to chase me outside into the cool afternoon air and not particularly spiky or insect-infested grass next to the chook pen. Said chooks are nowhere in site though, mostly due to the ministrations of Albert, the rather confused peacock from over the hill (literally as well as figuratively by now, as he must be getting near 15 years old which seems to be well over half his lifespan) (another side-note: sitting outside typing on a laptop with a peacock about 2M away will cause little old ladies to smile at you as they walk past, and almost totter on to the road). Albert is nominally owned by the Cox family, but seems to range over most of the hill and comes to visit us regularly. The coxes bought Albert a companion or 2 in years past, but according to mum 2 peahens isn't enough to sate the sexual appetite of a peacock, and he fucked them to an early grave.

In the intervening years he's had a crush on the rooster that used to live next door, the chickens he hung out with, our cats, mum (she's soooooo colourful, and about his size when the tail is in full force), and now our five chikkins. Just in case the heat didn't turn you on to it, or the fact that the wretched carnival was last weekend: it is springtime which equates to sexin' time in Al's books, so he's once again on the lookout for potential mates. As usual the chickens were decidedly unimpressed with the size and colour of his tail (although if he'd brought them sunflower seeds or left over pasta they would be lining up to be mounted), so he turned his attentions to Jaymis, his laptop, and the small whinging kitten accompanying him on his adventure in the grass.

We weren't any more attentive, Albert got bored. Outside really isn't that cool anyway.

I hope that sidenote thing works there, I just moulded a bit of html code out of thin air using the auspicious finger wiggle technique, but it seems to have some potential.

And now: it's time to make some chai, eat some food, and do some other stuff. Dave apparently wants some audio software,

just letting you know the hollardores are playing at the shamrock this saturday. http://www.hollardores.com It's a bit exspensive cos theres something on, but I want to go cos they have a new member now and I havnt seen him play.

Nice looking girl. Tall, blonde thin. Holding a folder and wearing a name tag. Couldn't read it because I noticed she had a nice pair of boobs on her. She's walking to me, smiling. Dave is smoking his cigarette and looking at boobs and wondering how hes about to get scammed.

SCAM: Hi.
DOCTOR: G'day.
S: Are you having a nice day?
D: Fuck no.
S: Oh why not?
D: Cause I'm at work. It sucks the nice out of every day.
S: Whats you're name?
D: ..... Dave
S: You've got great hair dave.
D: Um. Thanks.
S: Can I touch it?
D (thinking about his penis): Heh. Yeah go for it.
S: Those rings you've got in there are great.
D (still thinking about his cock and now trying not to laugh and seem insane): Thanks. (its not working). I got them in Newtown.
S: So dave do you like children?
D: No.
S: Do you have any yourself?
D: I might.
S (getting the the point finally): Well I'm from Christian Fuckwits and I'm trying to get people to sponser children locked in the cellars of preists with little food and lots of soddomy...
D: If I sponsored a child, would you teach them about god?
FUCKIN DIRTY CHRISTIAN: Yes, part of progra...
D: I'm not giving you any money then. Unless I can sponsor a child and not have you going and teaching it about god.
FDC: Ha. Yeaaaaah. We'll see what we can do. So how old are you?
D: 19.
FDC: Oh. We'll we're looking for people who are 21 or over.
D: What?
FDC: (already walking away): How bout we come back and see you when you're 21? Enjoy the rest of your day.
D: THE AGE OF CONSENT IS LIKE, 17 OR SOMETHING.

Put my cigarette out. Back to work. Pick up the phone because its not looking like anyone else will.

DAVE: dave speaking.
PHONE: Hi. This is from in Villawood.
D: What can I do for you?
P: We just recieved a package with a courier from you and its for not for us.
D: And uh.. you're not them are you?
P: No. They're up the street.
D (fuck. sent a VIP courier with some important stuff to the wrong address. Same suburb, same client, wrong company. Saw the right suburb and picked the wrong one out of the freight computer.) I dont suppose you could like, take it up to them? I'll give you the street number.
P: HOW DARE YOU?!
D: ...... how dare I what?
P: IM A BUSY PERSON I DONT HAVE TIME TO FIX YOUR MISTAKES.
D: But you said it was just up the...
P: IM IMPORTANT AND GOOD AND MY TIME IS WORTH LOTS OF MONEY ME ME IT WAS YOUR MISTAKE ETC.
D: So.. you want to keep the brochures?
P: No. I'll send them back on a courier this afternoon.
D: Maybe.. Maybe if you don't have time to take them over, you could just write the correct street number on it and ask the post person to take it round?
P: ITS NOT HIS JOB TO FIX YOUR MISTAKES EITHER.
D: ...... You know that stock you really need tommorrow? The and the etc?
P: WHAT ABOUT IT?
D: I think the freight company is going to lose it. (fuck! dont ask for my boss dont ask for my boss dont ask ..)
P: ..........................
D: (ill tell her i dont have a boss.. i dont even work here.. did i say my name was dave? my name isnt dave.. its jesusfucker.. dave is like... not here man)
P: ... would it arrive on time if I took this package to ?
D: I'd say the chances would get a whole lot better.
P: Fine. I'll take it round now.

Ring the correct company.

CC: Hello?
D: Hi its dave from .
CC: Whats up?
D: That stuff you wanted red hotted over. I sent it to down the road, is bring it round to you now.
CC: Ah yes, here she is now. Thanks.
D: No problem. Would you just be able to tell her that her order arrived yesterday and was signed for by ?
CC: Uhh.. Okay.
D: Thanks.

Now to see if I get in trouble. About time for another smoke.

Work makes me bitter.

[21:25] .:[ mpathy ]:.: i love yahoo

joepilldy: do we win bux yet
brighteyes362000: notyet, but soon
doctordavelovespuppies: im stoned